odds

my odds for downs syndrome are the best they will set. same for trisomy 18. i am elated. and with no testing or other appointments until 11/2, i am finally starting to relax.

my belly is growing. strangers ask when i am due. i think i may have felt one of the babes move last night (when M came into our bed and squished up against the belly). i find out the genders in three weeks. i rub my belly sometimes. we are casually shopping strollers online. other baby gear is creeping into my mind. my MIL is already talking baby shower (which i do not want, we already had one). we are looking at suburbs (ewwwww) and cars. i am only 14 weeks and 4 days, but i finally feel comfortable that i am pregnant.

i do not know what the turn around was, but somewhere in the past couple of weeks, i began to think less about the dangers/risks/problems with twins and pregnancy in general and more about having two more babies.

don't get me wrong, i still seethe at most of the infertiltiy coverage in the media (esp. from the ny times). i still get sad about my journey and jealous of those planning when to have a/another child. but for now, i am going to be pregnant.

and enjoy it.